Dealing with the Soul Reapers
by Urethane
Summary: Naruto Uzumaki, your everyday ramen powered immortal travelling shinobi with powers to destroy the world has accidentally landed in Sereitei and now has to deal with it's Soul Reapers and enemies, making new friends and foes along his journey. And maybe stop another upcoming war against the traitors of Sereitai and the army of Aizen. !StrongNaruto !DoujutsuNaruto !Harem


_Hello, this is Urethane and I'm here to rewrite the entirety of DWTSR._

_So far, if you read my old fics and compare them with my current ones, the current ones stand out further because I learnt how to write more fluently and put more emotion into my work. My older ones all have fight scenes and pointless garbage put together._

_Take for instance my RWBY and Naruto fic or my Avatar: TLA and Naruto fic, they both have tons of emotional stuff and the occasional fight scenes and I go in depth about the character._

_Reading back on the fics I wrote starting last year, I think I'll rewrite those. Especially this one, considering it was my first fic, which surprisingly, actually did really, really well. Didn't expect so many people to favourite and follow it._

_Anyways, I'll be rewriting every single chapter as time goes on, hopefully you'll like the re-written version where I elaborate more. Naruto will still be the same, as well as the plot. _

_Note, this will be a harem fic. And will also have humour and action/adventure in it. So if you don't like any of those, I'd suggest moving along._

_Also, suggestions for harem?_

_I'm definitely having Nel, she's just too cute, Yoruichi and Sui Feng, both of whom are insanely sexy, and more than likely Retsu, because she's one of my favourites, RIP ;(. Tia and her groupies? I love them too but I'm not too sure._

_That's pretty much it. I'm limiting the Harem to like, an average size, maybe seven to nine or something. They won't be having sex all at the same time (no matter how tempting that sounds) because that'll be a whole cluster fuck to write, but yeah, give it some thought and give me a few more names._

* * *

The tiny Nelliel stared in awe at the man that overshadowed her, his silhouette in front of the giant grinning moon of Hueco Mundo making him look fearsome. The large bandaged blade that he slung onto his shoulder without any form of difficulty helped emphasise his image tremendously. A man, looking no older than twenty, with brilliant blonde hair, bright blue eyes, wearing a white cloak adorned with flames coating his body and a casual set of clothes consisting of long black pants and a white-t with an orange spiral in the middle.

Rubbing his spiky head, the man sniffed, glaring at the group of Adjuchas in the distance.

"So, they were the ones who ate your brothers, huh?"

Nelliel nodded sadly at his words, oversized tears leaking from her eyes. Dondochakka and Pesche had protected her by sacrificing themselves, telling her to run while they combated the Adjuchas knowing that they would die, buying their 'little sister' time to run and escape. They were eventually overpowered and eaten by the Adjuchas, and the Hollows began searching for the runaway treat in the form of a crying little green haired girl with rags for clothes.

Naruto had found her by accident –to be honest, him getting here was a complete spur of the moment too- when he saw her stumbling around, bawling her eyes out and quickly went over to help her. He had questioned to himself silently on why there was a girl running around with what appeared to be a cracked ram's skull on her head in some unknown land, but decided to ignore it to help the girl out. He noticed that she seemed to be leaking a lot of power from the crack in her ram skull, but that was another question for another time. The girl, originally afraid of him, warmed up to him after he showed that he was a 'good guy' and she told him about what had happened. Naruto promised to help her find those responsible for her brothers' demise and make them pay for their actions.

Naruto kneeled down, so that he was closer to her, "Don't worry, Nel-chan." Naruto smiled confidently as he ran his thumb over her scar, making the girl stop her sniffling, a small smile appearing onto her face from the tender contact. "I'll make sure they won't eat you. They won't be eating anything once I'm done with them, 'K?"

"Sho'kay Naru, Nel beweives!" The girl hugged him for good luck, nearly tackling the man to the ground. "Oof!" Naruto grunted as Nel's skull fragment butted him in the gut, her unbelievable strength contained in such a small body. Patting her head one more time, the girl released him and Naruto stood back up and turned to the Adjuchas that were approaching cockily.

"Oi, you five." Naruto turned to look at them, glaring at them. The Adjuchas stared back, waiting for Naruto to speak before they killed him. "You killed little Nel-chan's brothers, didn't-cha?"

The one with the smiling white mask chuckled, patting his gut. "Yeah, we ate them up real good. And we're going to eat you and the brat up too!"

"Then I have a question to ask…" In an instant, Naruto slammed Samehada onto the smiling one, crushing him beneath the force of his swing and the weight of Samehada. He grinned as they backed up in shock, having been unable to catch up with Naruto's speed. Nel cheered in the background, whooping as one of her brother's killers was squashed into the sands of Hueco Mundo. Naruto's grip on Samehada tightened and the weapon seemed to want to taste Hollow flesh. Abiding to his weapon's wills, Naruto unfurled the bandages covering the body of Samehada. His eyes never left the Adjuchas, but he was smiling as he yanked the bandages off.

The Hollows stared at the sight of a released Samehada, her mouth grinning happily as her owner lifted her up into the air. Nel was shocked too, watching as Naruto's blade's spikes popped outwards, forming a very cruel looking mace.

"…Do you guys like the taste of shark?"

They died knowing that they indeed, did not like the taste of shark.

* * *

"Uh-oh…" Naruto stared out into the distance where two dust clouds were being kicked up, a sign that someone was travelling straight at them, fast. Naruto didn't want her to be caught in the crossfire, knowing that those headed towards him had, more than likely, no qualms about striking Nel down without hesitation. He'd have used Kamui to send her to his –Obito's- pocket dimension where he kept all of his important things, but he didn't want to risk hurting Nel, considering the fact that he had no idea what she was. She looked like a little girl and behaved like a little girl, but she certainly wasn't one. She felt more like those masked creatures -Hollows, Nel had informed him helpfully- he killed. No idea what sending her to another dimension could do to her, Naruto grimaced.

Turning to Nel, Naruto ran his fingers through her hair and the girl leaned into the contact, "Nel? I don't suppose you can escape can you?"

"Nel can opwen Gwarganta!" She stated proudly, putting her hands on her hips. Naruto smiled at the sight of her stance. Simply adorable. He recalled Himawari being much like her when she was still a child.

"I have no idea what that means," He looked unsure, "but where will that take you?"

"Nel can go to Shinigami Home, or Living Town!" Going on a hunch, Naruto could only guess that Living Town was what Nel dubbed the Human Realm. Naruto looked to the oncoming people briefly, eyes darting back to Nel. To the amazement of the little girl, Naruto summoned a Shadow Clone, the identical chakra creation poofed into existence beside him.

"Waaaah~!" She rushed up and began poking the clone, much to its amusement, "So cool!"

"Alright, Nel-chan, I need you to take my clone with you to Living Town, alright? And don't go anywhere without him, understood?" The girl nodded at his serious tone, a cute look on her face showing her determination to complete the task Naruto set for her. She wouldn't let him down!

"C'mon Naru-Clone! See ya Naru!" The girl bounced, pulling the clone along before she summoned a Garganta over a period of five seconds, pulling the clone through the mouth that opened up. Normally, one wouldn't be able to travel through the Garganta without using Reshi to walk, but Nel was doing a fine job at dragging the clone by the arm across and into the darkness, where the mouth soon close and sealed itself, returning the air to normal.

"Now…" Naruto looked at the rapidly approaching pair, noticing the glaring pink hair and tube-like head each of them had. "Who do we have here?" The pair eventually reached him, both floating in the air, staring down at him with their arms crossed.

"I am the Novena Espada, Aaroniero Arruruerie." The tube headed one spoke in two different voices, creeping Naruto out. Naruto opened his mouth, about to comment about the fact that the test-tube runaway had two faces, but was cut off by a palm. Irritatedly, the pair of voices spoke up again, "If it's about our faces, keep it to yourself. We got tired of hearing people's thoughts about them a very long time ago." Naruto's mouth closed slowly, feeling rather awkward at being figured out so easily.

The pink one gestured to himself grandly, speaking in an arrogant voice. "And I am Szayelaporro Granz, Octava Espada. We are here to dispose of you, human trash. There is no hope, and death is inevitable when facing the Espada. Now, won't you die for-"

Naruto interrupted his little speech, "-First of all, Espada? Octava and Novena? I have no idea what those mean. Second of all, did your parents hate you? 'Cos your names are fucking horrible, I mean seriously, 'Arrownehro Arrowrerie'? 'Szayel Apolllolol Grant'?" Naruto shook his head, not realising that he butchered their names horribly. He also chose to ignore the fury on Szayel face and –he guessed since he couldn't tell- Aaroniero's face(s).

Pointing Samehada right at them, Naruto frowned. "Thirdly, just for that 'human trash' comment, you're going to die painfully."

"Aw, the little human thinks he can-" He said no more as Naruto leaped up into the air, directly in front of them and slammed Samehada into his gut, faster than either of them could draw their blades. Szayel was sent towards the nearest sand dune at the speed of a train. Much like water, if unable to move apart in time due to a speeding object, hitting sand at such high speeds would lead to the same result as being slammed into concrete. It was unfortunate that he also bounced across the desert floor before making contact with the dune. His skin had been shredded in some places due to the gritty sand and his bones were definitely broken, his legs probably shouldn't be bending that way.

Naruto fell back to the floor, staring at the mess Szayel left in his wake. "Wow. If he were a stone, do you think he'd bounce as well?"

Aaroniero said nothing, choosing to dive downwards to the ground to attack Naruto with his Zanpakuto. Naruto easily dodged a slash, delivering a solid side kick to his glass-covered head. The Espada reeled as his two heads bounced on the glass painfully, the force behind the kick nearly shattering the dome. Naruto took the opportunity to send a roundhouse to the left side of his abdomen while he was distracted, kicking the Espada away and down from the dune they were both standing on.

Naruto looked over the top of the dune to see the gasping Aaroniero who clutched at his fractured ribs, his breath in two different pitches due to his two heads. Naruto ignored the tube-head, summoning a bunch of clones who went in search of Szayel.

* * *

The clones that was sent to search for Szayel found their target, who was crawling pathetically away from the battle where the real Naruto and Aaroniero was having. His limp legs, broken and snapped, were dragged along with his upper body, unable to be used due to their condition. The group of Naruto's walked over to his body and one of them bent down in front of Szayel, who was frantically dragging himself as fast as he could with his fingertips until a pair of sandals cut his way off.

One of them spoke up, the dedicated leader, "Hello Azazel," The man growled at the wrong name, but said nothing due to his broken pride at being defeated so easily, "All you have to do is apologise and I'll let you crawl away."

"Your words mean nothing to me, human scum!" Naruto looked impressed, probably because he hadn't anticipated how stupid this man was. It was as if he was purposely trying to get himself killed.

"Okay. Let him feel the pain, boys." The clone clapped and they all surrounded Szayel, covering him from sight.

"You'll never make me apolo… Ghk!" The leader punched him in the back, making him spit out a wad of blood and saliva. Another stomped on his fingers, but Szayel held strong, not wanting to take back what he said about Naruto being trash.

"Achk!" He cried before he stemmed his voice, not wanting Naruto to get the satisfaction from hearing his screams. "You think that hurts?! You'll have to do a lot more than-" They flipped him over to his belly, ignoring his words before a brutal beat down was laid upon Szayel, his body being bashed around and stomped on by the clones.

"Ah! Agh!" Two of the clones at his legs, grabbed the ruined excuse for limbs and yanked on them hard. The sound of cracks and snaps from his legs joined the air beside Szayel's ignored pleas and begs, and Naruto's clone's fists meeting Szayel's flesh.

"ARGH! MY LEGS! YOU LITTLE-" A boot kicked most of his teeth in, halting his insult as blood pooled in his mouth.

"Still not apologising? Well, suit yourself! _Sennen Goroshi (One Thousand Years of Death)!_" The clones that pulled his legs and broke them further -or straightened them out if you want to be accurate- drove their fingers up into the pink haired scientist's backdoor.

"AAAAAIIIEEEEEE!"

* * *

"For -what do you call yourselves again? Espada?" Naruto looked to the man for confirmation. Receiving none, he just decided to roll with it. "Right, Espada. You guys sure are weak."

"AAAAAIIIEEEEEE!" Both paused, listening to the pink haired man's screams. Naruto nodded along to his screams.

"See, weak. I didn't even scream that much when Kyoshi-chan-"

"Savour this human. Cero!" A beam of light-blue energy that he had formed on his other hand was directed at Naruto's chest, sending the blonde backwards into the dune. Slamming into the side, the sand slid over his body, covering him in shimmering white grains.

"Hmph. All that talk, and yet you-" Aaroniero stopped himself at the sight of the sand in front of him rumbling, and moved to the left, narrowly avoiding a spear of sand that grazed his glass mask. Fearing the sand, he took off to the eternal night sky of Hueco Mundo and watched the ground for any movements, away from the sand. Glaring at the spot where he shot Naruto, he growled out in his dual voice, expressing his disbelief at how Naruto was still alive and controlling sand.

"Impossible. You should have died from that. No human would be able to survive a point blank Cero to the chest."

Then Naruto's response came from behind him. "I'unno, I tend to do the impossible. If you're wondering that was just a clone, I didn't get hit at all." Aaroniero spun around, but a giant fist made from the sparkling sand collided with his face, knocking him back to the ground again. "Like, I actually got a girlfriend, got married to said girlfriend, had sex with my lovely wife, and got to be a father. Tsunade-baa-chan did say that those were all pretty impossible, and I almost agreed with her, that was until I remembered that I was-" He jabbed a thumb into his chest, Samehada sitting snug on his back, "-UZUMAKI NARUTO! AND UZUMAKI NARUTO ALWAYS DOES THE IMPOSSIBLE!"

* * *

Nel spun around in the park, waving her hands wildly in the air as she danced in the morning light of the Human Realm. They had left the Garganta a while ago and both the girl and the clone was simply enjoying the heat of the sun.

"Nel-chan?" The clone asked the little green girl, who turned around and faced him. "Why didn't you use the Garganta earlier on to help your brothers?"

Nel looked downcast again, feeling guilty that her brothers had died in her place. She had been the one to disturb the Adjuchas, which lead to them hunting the trio down. Tugging at her green rags for clothes, she began sniffling again, making the clone feel like an ass for making her cry.

"Nel was scwared an' then I forgwot!" Naruto quickly diffused the sadness by cuddling the girl, who rubbed her tears away into Naruto's clone's shirt. The clone couldn't get mad at the girl, she was the epitome cuteness. With her large sad puppy eyes, Nel could easily curl men with iron wills around her finger, making them do her bidding by staring at them with her hazel eyes.

"Oh don't cry, I'm here for you now, right?" Nel wrapped her arms around his waist at his words, and the clone gasped for air as the iron vice-grip locked around his gut. She had nearly dispelled the clone from her backbreaking hug. Rubbing her cheek into his toned stomach, she looked up to his twitching blue eyes with her hazel ones, smiling widely.

"Yeah… Naru and Naru-Clone's here for me!"

"Naru-Clone won't be-" He gasped, trying to pry the girl off of him, "-here any longer-" The clone's face began turning blue, trying his best to hold out for a few more seconds before he would burst into smoke and disappear, "-if you hold on so tightly!"

The last thing he wanted was to have an exuberant kid like Nel running around the Human Realm, no doubt unknowingly causing havoc with her excitement for all things new and shiny.

A black cat strolled up to the pair, staring at them with large gold eyes.

"Meeeow~!" Upon hearing the cat's gentle call, Nel released a thankful clone and turned around, looking with wide eyes at the animal, her sadness forgotten in an instant with the arrival of the feline. Grabbing Naruto excitedly, she began pointing at the mammal, wanting so desperately to cuddle it.

Scratch that. All things new and shiny, as well as cats.

"Naru-clone, what's that?!" Nel gawped at the sight of the kitty, trying to grab it and give it a hug. Naruto had to hold the girl back by the waist, no easy feat, in order to prevent her from running off. The cat stared at the strange pair, their blonde and green hair standing out in the normal black that Karakura was used to.

"That's, ugh, a cat, ugh, Nel." Naruto told her through grunts and gritted teeth, his knees sliding through the dirt as Nel slowly dragged him along with her, arms outstretched to grab the cat. "Or a, ugh, kitty, if you will."

Nel paused and turned to look at him, stroking his cheeks tenderly. "Kitty has whiskers! Just like Naru! Naru is cat!" Then she turned back around to continue her chase on the unmoving kitty. The cat tilted it's head, apparently amused by the sight.

"Fox! Ugh!" She nearly slipped out of his grasp, "But close! Darn it, Nel, calm down and I'll let you pet the kitty!" Heeding his words, Nel stopped trying to run at the cat, allowing Naruto to heave a heavy sigh of relief. Looking behind him, the shallow double trench he dug with his knees were a good two metres, showing just how strong and high in stamina Nel was. Upon releasing the girl, the cat turned and began strutting off to an alleyway, with Nel slowly creeping after the cat and Naruto walking behind the girl, making quite the sight for any passer-by's.

* * *

"FUUUUCK!"

Naruto came soaring down from the rift in the sky, the two figures in the black hole staring at him with one of them waving goodbye to him, a cocky smile on his face as the blonde that had slaughtered two of the lower ranking Espada and a few hundred Hollows feel straight into Shinigami Central.

A bandaged fist tightened, the cerulean eye twitching irritably as he watched the space between him and the rift get further.

Holy shit, Naruto swore, when he got his hands on that fucking piece of shit-

"Catch you later, shithead!" Nnoitra cackled, while Starrk looked at the strong foe fall towards the white city impassively. Hopefully, they wouldn't have to deal with him anytime soon. The Primera knew that they were lucky, considering that the blonde hadn't gone all out.

It seemed as if he was trying to protect something, which was why he controlled his power and lowered it greatly. Stark knew that much considering that the cloaked man had an abundance of power locked within him… But just what was it that he was trying to protect? Wait a minute, wasn't there another person with him? Where did they go? Eh, he wasn't paid enough to think about these things. Hopefully, they'd never have to meet again. The Shinigami would easily take care of him for trespassing. Right now, he had earned himself a nice nap.

Realistically, Naruto didn't go all out due to the fact that he didn't want to give all his cards out. There was no telling how strong their leader was, and he didn't want to risk letting them learn of his different skills. He might have had a whole library, an arsenal capable of destroying continents, worth of knowledge in his head, but it was still better to have any form of one-ups on his enemies. Still, getting hit by the Cero blasts hurt a lot, more than anyone he had fought in two hundred years.

"YOU FUCKIN' WAIT! I'M COMING FOR YOUR ASS, PIRATE SPOON-HEAD!" The Fifth Espada laughed evilly, the rift closing up and leaving the beautiful sky, all blue like the blonde's eyes, unmarred. His clothes were all but gone, burnt to bits after being blasted around by the Cero the lazy bastard kept firing at him. Grunting angrily, Naruto looked down and watched as he came closer and closer to the white coloured buildings, the colour of purity, especially the one that was right below him.

"Goddamn it, this is going to suck." Raising his arms to his chest defensively, Naruto braced for impact.

He smashed through the roof of the first building; his body tearing right through the roof like it was made of paper, which was pretty much true considering how fast he was falling.

Fortunately for him, he landed on top of a bed.

Unfortunately, the bed crumpled under the force, slamming him into the ground, cushioned only by the cotton in the bed. It didn't help that there were springs in the bed too.

"Argh… Fuck, my knees… my body." Naruto groaned. He might have been super strong back in the day, able to take on the Rabbit Goddess by himself –since Sasuke died midway- but that was aeons ago, and since no foe was as strong as she was, he was kind of used to fighting people that were very much weaker than him.

Throughout the years after the Shinobi Era ended, Naruto had only faced a handful of people who genuinely did make Naruto try in a fight. His battles often ended when he usually defeated his foes by flicking them in the head, and the few that made him actually throw his punches hard were tough as nails.

During the Golden Age of Pirates, there were those damn pirates, many of them with strange powers –Naruto recalled a boy (Was his name Guffy G. Ape?) who reminded him of himself, except with rubber abilities- but their weakness to water really hampered their fighting ability. Naruto had a harem during that time-period, his wives Hancock, Robin and Vivi were lovely women who were not to be trifled with just because of their good looks.

Oh man, the three of them combined could do that one trick with their tongues and- Er, well, that's a story for another time.

And there was that very long time-period where the continents were split up into four, and much to the surprise of Naruto, the people had elemental affinities. Benders were what they were called and they could only use one of four, but it was still something relatively close to the Shinobi Era. He had fought with multiple mad men who came from what they called the 'Fire Nation', but never killed them. Actually, one of Naruto's wives came from that era, and the woman lived up to 230 until she kicked the bucket, showing just how badass she was. Kyoshi was her name and goddamn could she kick his ass. Apparently she was the chosen one, the Avatar, who was destined to bring peace to the world.

Pfft, he heard that a long time ago as the Child of Prophecy.

But somewhere down along the road, after many more life times, the Avatar Cycle ended alongside the Four Nation's Period, when the world didn't need the Avatar anymore.

So yeah, years of not facing tough enemies like a goddess tended to make you slightly weaker. And falling from such a height straight into the ground tended to hurt a lot more than Kyoshi's Earthbending.

"Oh dear… How are you still alive, falling from the sky like that?" A gentle voice asked as Naruto blinked slowly as his vision began blurring hard. "And just who might you be?"

In the midst of his concussion, Naruto began stammering, his speech and mind temporarily impaired. "I'm strong… I think, and… I'm… Er- I'm Uzu-" He blanked out for a moment, staring into space, "-ruto… Makinaru."

"Well, Makinaru-san, I suppose you need medical assistance?" She asked kindly. Naruto could only make out the large breasts that were in his face and the braided black hair that sat between them. Nodding, Naruto did his best not to stare at the enormous melons, choosing to lie down on the broken bed, the metal that held it turned to scrap beneath Naruto.

"I'd… like that." Naruto closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, taking a nap to heal his slightly broken body. The beautiful woman smiled before she went to the door way to ask for assistance from her second in command.

"Isane-chan," Unohana called out to the other room, her voice soft and gentle in order not to wake any of her patients up. Her lieutenant stuck her silver coloured head out from behind a wall, waiting for her captain's orders. "I need a new bed, water and some bandages, if you'd please."

The lieutenant raised an eyebrow, staring at her smiling captain with suspicion, "About that crashing noise…"

"Fret not," Unohana placated her worries, "Someone just decided to drop right on in to the Fourth Division." The silver haired girl nodded, turning to grab what her captain needed, wondering why she needed a new bed.

"Oh my, such a handsome young man, all for me?" Unohana giggled behind her hand, checking Naruto's head for any wounds. "I'll make sure to treat you just right, Makinaru-san." She whispered playfully to the sleeping man.

* * *

_Chapter End._

* * *

_So hey, tell me how I did with this rewrite. I added in new parts and took away old ones, trying to introduce characters and develop their relationship unlike the old one._

_Reviews would be lovely._

_Catch you all in the next chapter._


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